Fog

Fog comes in,

creeping.

Blocking our view.

     I wrote those words when I was ten years old. Since then it has been published in various publications, from anthologies to legal journals. In reflecting about the year that draws to a close, and the one that is to begin; one can’t help but reflect, rewind if  you will.

     When I think of the fog that creeps in, eventually blocking our view. I think of the slow process it involves before engulfing us in a cloud inpenetrable by our eyes. Suddenly we can’t see what’s in front of us, or behind us. We can’t recognize in which direction we need to go.

     How true this is in the reality of life. Our biggest obstacles creep into our lives ever so slowly, unrecognizable, undetectable, under the radar; until it is too late to see passed it. All we can do is wait for it to pass over, like fog, creeping back out or simply disappearing into thin air just as swiftly as it appeared.

[Via http://joelsantos.wordpress.com]

e[lust] #4

HNT Courtesy of Molls (via Eat The Cake NYC)

Welcome to e[lust] - your source for sexual intelligence and inspirations of lust from the smartest & sexiest bloggers! Whether you’re looking for hot steamy smut, thought-provoking opinions or expert information, you’re going to find it here. Want to be included in e[lust] #5? Start with the rules, check out the schedule in the site’s sidebar and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

♦ This Week’s Top Three Posts ♦

Interrogation - I looked up at him, feigning cluelessness. “I know you can understand me. So I ask you again. Where are the lenses?” Another strike. I crumpled into the bench.

Reconciling the Identities of Feminist & Butch Top - There’s something supposedly anti-feminist about wanting to dominate. There’s something in the feminist rhetoric which says we are all equal especially in bed, so that means I-do-you-you-do-me….

Fire and Ice – The rain comes down harder around us, the freez­ing drop pelt­ing what­ever skin lies exposed over the sur­face of the water.

◊ e[lust] Editress ◊

By the Twinkling Lights… - His lips found my nipples and I forgot about the cold. If a car were to drive by and the passengers were to look past the twinkling lights on the tree, they would have seen a naked woman’s rear end pressed against the glass wall..

♦ Featured Post (Lilly’s Pick) ♦

Ronjazz: Late Night Rendezvous - Meet me in the parking lot at the post with the broken lamp. 10PM sharp! Do not be late! Stand facing the post, eyes closed. Wear a flimsy dress and heels – nothing else!

 

See also: Pleasurists #58 and #59 for all your sex toy review needs

View All The New Posts Here…

[Via http://jydavis.wordpress.com]

The Married Man aka My Ex's Best Friend

It all started with an ill fated move across the country to be with P. I thought that he was my soul mate and the love I had been looking for all of my life. Well, it didn’t quite work out that way and I was devastated. We lived together in a one bedroom apt and neither of us had a lot of money, so moving was out of the question at that time. We tried to remain friendly, and, of course, we were still having sex. After a few months, I started seeing other people (stories about them to come later!). He started seeing other people as well.

Let me give you a little background on P. P is my cousin’s best friend. And so is D. D, P and my cousin have known each other since middle school (friends for over 20 years). P is a musician. He is also in a rap group. D is married with 3 children and my cousin just broke up with his girlfriend. He has 2 children. Me, I’m single and childless!

Back in August, P had a show. We had been broken up for about 7 months (3 months not having sex) at this time. My cousin was going to give me a ride to the show and P was supposed to give me a ride back to our house. P had just started seeing this girl and I think that it was more serious then he let on. I come home from work to find D giving P a haircut before the show. P says, “D is gonna give you a ride home”. Needless to say, I was pissed! D didn’t mind, so I just said ok and went with it. They both left. I called my cousin and told him the situation. He tells me that he’s running late and he’s gonna call D and see if he can come pick me up, too. Well, alrighty then! Everyone’s pushing me off on D. I call one of my girlfriend’s from home and ask her, “How bad would it be if I fucked P’s best friend?” Just joking, of course. But, even still, I was horny as hell and I kind of wanted to see how far I could get with him. It didn’t take long to find out.

D came to pick me up and I apologized to him for everyone dumping me off on him. He said, “No need to apologize! What guy wouldn’t want to walk in with a beautiful girl?” I knew right then, I had him. I just had to play my cards right. Throughout the night, he would come over and check on me (I was selling merchandise for the group) and we’d talk a bit and then he’d go back to dancing.

The end of the night came and we were both a little tipsy. As we made our way back home, I turned the conversation towards sex mentioning that it had been a long time since I’d had any. He said that was too bad and he was sure that there were plenty of guys that would love to have sex with me. And there are. But, I don’t want random guys. My body count is high enough as it is (I went through a “phase” in my early 20s, lol). I told him I was just looking for one guy to have sex with, not necessarily a relationship. As we approached downtown, he mentioned that he had a key to his bosses office that’s in one of the office towers. I might’ve mentioned that I’ve had sex in bosses office before and if he ever had the opportunity to do it, he should. He made a quick turn and next thing you know, we were on the 12th floor sneaking into his bosses office!

The place was deserted. He made small talk, showing me things about his program… I wasn’t really listening.I don’t remember who mentioned it first, but somehow we started talking about why we were there. Then came the “you know, no one can find out about this, P would be pissed and my wife would kill us both…” blah, blah, blah. I reassured him that this was not my first time dealing with a married man and I knew how to keep my mouth shut. That was all he needed to hear. His mouth was on mine in no time. There was no awkward, try to figure out how you kiss, moment, either. Are kissing styles are very complimentary. Best kisser I’ve been with in years. His hands roamed all over my body, stopping only on my breasts. He couldn’t get enough, so off came my shirt and bra. His mouth immediately covered my nipples sending shivers all through my body. I took his shirt off and went for his belt buckle. Soon, we were both butt naked on the floor in his boss’s office. He used his tongue to explore every part of my body and I was on fire! When he went down and started to perform orally, it was all over. I was trying my best to stay quiet, but my vocal chords were betraying me. Then, he was ready to go to work. He laid on top of me and did his best to work his penis inside (it had been a long time, remember…). Once it was inside, we both exhaled and he put it on me for the next 5 minutes. He did not last long. I think the excitement of being in the boss’s office, plus cheating on his wife, plus me being his best friend’s ex, was all too much for him. I don’t blame him, though. It’s happened to the best of them. The good thing is, I had orgasmed about 3 or 4 times from the oral sex, so I was ok.

We cleaned up, got back in the car and made our way to my house. His wife had called at least 5 times during our escapade, so he had to come up with his reason for not answering. He dropped me off and we made plans to meet again… More to come later!

-J

[Via http://scorpiofiles.wordpress.com]

Calendar Girls Day: Nice Jewish Guys edition

There is a calendar out there for everybody. Here are some of the handsome and genuine gents of the very cool Nice Jewish Guys calendar, which I stumbled on via the hilarious blog dealbreaker on the tumblr (Dave Horowitz, one of the hosts, is Mr. November).

The calendar, which includes both Jewish and secular holidays, features 12 “nice Jewish guys”, or, as [calendar creator Adam]Cohen puts it: “guys who are non-threatening, nice to a fault, trustworthy and just very normal-looking”.

According to Mr Cohen, each picture tells a story. “There is the main ‘hero’ picture for each guy and then three smaller ‘action’ ones — these guys are flexing everything they got, which isn’t much but you still have to love them.” (“Adam Cohen creates a calendar.” Krieger, Candace. Nov. 18, 2009. The Jewish Chronicle online edition.)

By no intent of mine, because there’s virtually no way of predicting cutness v. uncutness, but instead by some weird confluence of fateful events outside my control, it’s been years since I’ve been with someone uncircumcised. I’m not officially throwing down for either of the sides of that debate because I guess they both have their merit or whatever, but we can all agree that variety is the spice of life and I guess what I am really saying is that if you stumbled on this by egosurfing, and you are a Nice Jewish Boy, especially one of the ones in the calendar, like, you can drop a line. That would be okay.

Portions of the proceeds from calendar sales go to Mazon: A Jewish Response to Hunger, so when you’re buying for yourself, think about picking up an extra for a friend!

[Via http://thethoughtexperiment.wordpress.com]

We Don't Need to Be in Love, to Do What Lovers Do

Isn’t it crazy, that when you’re absolutely gagging for it and (probably) more than a little bit drunk…DAMN you put them moves down good…

Now, I’m not a particular fan of ‘girl on top’, it makes me feel, well, kind of…ergh and a little nervous. The angles all wrong, it’s clumsy, thrusts take a while to become all rhyth-matic, and the whole situation is uncomfortable and completely un-sexy.

So why, just when I’m nearly a reborn virgin, and I’ve clearly got rather friendly with tequila, I become like this girl on top – goddess.

 I’m pushing him down, ripping off his clothes, taking down my pants – rather sexily I might add, (despite the fact that five minutes ago I couldn’t even stand without swaying) and riding it like it’s a fucking bronco.

From what I remember of the passion, it was pretty good, and my performance – some of my best work. Compliments to me… I’d say, especially since my one night partner, wasn’t such a one-nighter after all.

And I introduce Indie Guy…

Already somewhat of an acquaintance, tequila aided our apparently blossoming friendship. I’m not sure how this story goes, but it’s something like this.

So, Indie Guy I haven’t had any sexy in a while. Fancy it?

Alright, just kidding, I remember him being somewhat gentleman-ly.

But you’ll regret it…

Believe me, no I won’t.

Wham. Bam. Thank you Mam.

I arose the next morning feeling rather pleased with myself, it (the performance) went well, and knowing that Indie Guy was a bit of a stud I presumed this was it. A night of illicit passion.

It was rather strange waking up with someone, I knew little of. Having the conversation we probably should have uttered pre bone.

Where you from?

Your, how old?! Oh.

What you studying?

He left a few hours after we woke up, we spoke the next day via facebook chat, something we had never previously communicated on. I passed it off as him being polite really.

Until two nights later where we drunkenly bumped into each other, he kissed me, took my phone number, and kissed me again. It was all very public and rather passionate too.

He began to show a real interest in me, and invited me round a few days later, for some reason I didn’t go, I think mainly I didn’t want to end up having sober sex and admitting in some way that I liked him – through sobriety.

Although Indie Guy and I have had many drunken meetings, one in fact where I think he was sober, and a couple where we’ve actually just fell asleep all cuddly (we’ve become all cuddly!).

I’m still not really sure what Indie Guy wants from me.

Or if I want anything from him.

And for now, have we just become unspoken fuck buddies…?

[Via http://daisyjenson.wordpress.com]

Here we go...

Sometimes people decide to start at the beginning, but that won’t work because the first eighteen years of my life were fairly uneventful. This blog, which a friend suggested I create, is about love, relationships, sex, and my quest to find the one. Before eighteen, I had not experienced love or relationships, and it wasn’t until I was twenty that I experienced sex. After twenty, after the “first time”, sex and I got well-acquainted. And as far as finding the one, I don’t know when that will happen (if it ever does). I’m twenty-eight years old.  The last ten years have been full (and sometimes quite empty) of love, relationships, sex, and a whole lot more.

This is my story; this is my life.

~Mela

[Via http://melamadele.wordpress.com]

Merry wassname

This is my last day of work before Chrimble. I’ll be in Roman land, which should be a bit of a laugh as today was the day that the Romano-Britons celebrated Saturnalia, which was their equivalent. They would bring greenery indoors, decorate with pretty lights and give each other gifts. What does that sound like? Some cynics have suggested that the Christians simple appropriated Saturnalia to sway the largely unbelieving population that Christianity wasn’t all doom and martyrs on sticks. However, there is a Christian counter-theory (isn’t there always?) it argues that while the Biblay makes absolutely NO mention of Dec 25th being of any import whatsoever it does mention the date 25th March as being when the Angel visited Mary to say that God had…you know…knocked her up. If you work forward nine months voila!

With the whole “I am your God! Oh, by the way you’re pregnant.” Does that make Yahweh our first absentee dad of record? I mean, he’s all powerful but couldn’t even swing the poor buggers a room in even the shadiest of Bethlehemian Holiday Inns? Not cool dude, not cool.

Anyway, enough religious rilings lets enjoy the festivities!

Oh, I won’t be blogging again until the 28th now so enjoy.

[Via http://anactorslife.wordpress.com]

I AIN'T DOWN WITH CONDOMS

Don’t let embarrassment become a health risk. Talk with your sex partner about condoms? Avert has listed some great excuses and good answers:

EXCUSE: Don’t you trust me?
ANSWER: Trust isn’t the point, people can have infections without realising it.

EXCUSE: It does not feel as good with a condom
ANSWER: I’ll feel more relaxed, If I am more relaxed, I can make it feel better for you.

EXCUSE: I don’t have a condom with me
ANSWER: I do

EXCUSE: I don’t stay hard when I put on a condom
ANSWER: I’ll help you put it on, that will help you keep it hard.

EXCUSE: I am afraid to ask him to use a condom. He’ll think I don’t trust him.
ANSWER: If you can’t ask him, you probably don’t trust him.

EXCUSE: I can’t feel a thing when I wear a condom
ANSWER: Maybe that way you’ll last even longer and that will make up for it

EXCUSE: I don’t stay hard when I put on a condom
ANSWER: I’ll help you put it on, that will help you keep it

EXCUSE: It’s up to him… it’s his decision
ANSWER: It’s your health. It should be your decision too!

EXCUSE: I’m on the pill, you don’t need a condom
ANSWER: I’d like to use it anyway. It will help to protect us from infections we may not realise we have.

ANSWER: It just isn’t as sensitive and I can’t feel a thing ANSWER: Maybe that way you will last even longer and that will make up for it

EXCUSE: Putting it on interrupts everything
ANSWER: Not if I help put it on

EXCUSE: I guess you don’t really love me
ANSWER: I do, but I am not risking my future to prove it

EXCUSE: I will pull out in time
ANSWER: Women can get pregnant and get STDs from pre-ejaculate

EXCUSE: But I love you
ANSWER: Then you’ll help us to protect ourselves.

EXCUSE: Just this once
ANSWER: Once is all it takes

There are many reasons to use condoms when having sex. You could go through these reasons with your partner and see what she/he thinks.

[Via http://marlonb.wordpress.com]

Dinosaurs,weird sh*t, and masturbation.

Alright I was one of those weird ass chics I still am. I talk about random sh*t thats why blogs and twitter fit into my daily life. My birthday week was awesome,Christmas will be too! Ok enough about that. I noticed how every popular Vietnamese person’s last name is Nguyen. People probably are like “How the f*ck do I say this sh*t?” It doesn’t matter just make sure you don’t call that Vietnamese person a Jap,Korean,philli,or malaysian and they’ll never be offended.

So what’s your favorite dinosaur? Mines is a Muthaf*ckin T-rex yes. :] they make me happy.(I wasn’t lying when I said I was weird) but yes the amazing T-rex. Oh how I love your little arms and your huge head with them thick thighs. I always wondered…if a T-rex could masturbate…how could they do it? I mean is that why they are always shouting and being angry? I know no damn female dinosaur wanna hop on that,and the muthaf*cka can’t even hit it from the back because he don’t got nothin to hold on to he’ll just f*ckin fall. I know T-rex’s be getting sexually frustrated…I would be too if I had some little ass arms and couldn’t reach down to my crotch area,and what makes it worse is that I can’t even fuck anything…smh they must have been some depressing ass creatures…”RAHAHHHARR!! SOMEONE FUCK MEHH!!! RAAWRWRR!!! I CAN’T REACH MY DIIICCK!!! WTFFF!!!” Gettin mad and sh*t.

Exactly.

[Via http://brendavu.wordpress.com]

On Hookers

I like hookers. I’ve seen a few of them and generally had a great time. It’s not just the sex that I like, though they were uniformly good and hot. Rather, I also like the conversation and intimacy that emerges. All of them had a least some college education (and one even has a master’s in engineering) and they were generally very interesting conversationalists.I make anough money to where I can pay a premium — $300-400 per hour — so I don’t know what it’s like to go with a less expensive provider. In other words, your mileage may vary.

If you’re thinking about trying an escort or just want to know more about them, here are a few sites I recommend:

The Erotic Review – Spend the $20 and to get access to the reviews. You can learn exactly what sex acts a girl is willing to perform, how attractive she is in person, what she’s like in bed etc.

The Real Princess Diaries – Very well-written blog by a working escort in San Francisco. She obviously loves to fuck and can command a premium price for it. She also runs a site called My First Professional Sex.

Debauchette – She doesn’t post often, but presents the real-life perspective of an escort. Very smart and sensitive.

HappyEndingz – Confessions of a massage parlor girl. Not really my thing, or at least I’ve never tried it, but it’s fun to hear her perspective. I wonder how many handjobs she’s given in her life?!

Las Vegas Courtesan – she mostly posts sexy pictures of herself (she studied photography in college) but also occasionally writes about the escort industry in Vegas, where prostitution is still illegal even though it’s legal in the the rest of Nevada.

[Via http://pornsgoodguy.com]

A Sweet Goodbye (the end?)

We talked as I dressed. I’d worn my blindfold all evening and, while I wasn’t wearing it while I dressed, I knew I wasn’t allowed to peek. I sat on the edge of the bed slowly, slowly adding articles of clothing. He told me it was time and still I hesitated, lingering on the bed, not quite daring to touch his still naked body. Silently he handed me my blindfold and I pulled it low over my eyes.

I love everything about my Master, the way his skin feels when I touch it, the way he can turn instantly from sweet and nurturing into a sexual force of nature, powerful and full of need. I love the way his cock feels as it grows in my mouth, his hands tangled in my hair as he chokes me on it. I love the way it feels while he pounds into me, my arms pinned above my head. I love the feel of him pushing into my ass, knowing that he is big enough to tear me apart if I do not let go to his insistence. I love the way his hands always find the places I need to be touched, whether it is the sharp pain of a pinched nipple or the slow, sweet torture of his fist buried deep. Most of all, I love the way I am powerless when I am with him, floating away on the knowledge that I am well and truly possessed by a man who appreciates the woman I am.

When I am away from my family, I make certain that my phone is on just in case. On occasion it has been known to go off at the most inopportune time, but Master always makes certain that I check it as soon as possible. It had been one of those days, busy and my phone was ringing off the hook.

When my blindfold was once more in place, Master gently took me by the hand, pulling me off the bed and onto a pillow he had placed on the floor to cushion my knees. He positioned himself at the edge of the bed and I drank in his scent. I leaned forward, kissing the tip of him. Fully dressed and blindfolded, I slipped my mouth over the head of his perfect cock, sucking it gently into my mouth. He tasted of me and it was a gift, a reminder of the time we’d spent together. I like it when he is still soft because I can fill myself with him, suck him entirely into my mouth and down my throat.

I used my tongue, my lips to caress the length of him. My Master grew wonderfully hard in my mouth as I stroked him and he whispered to me how beautiful I was sucking his cock. He held my wrists, pinning them to the bed and I knew my charge was to bring him only using my mouth. I sucked him deep again, choking as tears streamed down my face.  I was perfectly happy, exactly in the place I longed to be.

It was, of course, at precisely that moment that my phone went off. Master’s body went tense, then slack with disappointment. He released my wrists. I  couldn’t bring myself to care who it was or what they wanted. I pulled myself closer, sliding my hands back up to meet his, twining our fingers together. I held on to his hands and pulled myself tightly down around his now throbbing hard cock. I choked on the girth of him, doing my best to take him down my throat. I sped up my motion, sucking first the tip of him and then sliding my lips as far down the length of him as possible.

Suddenly Master pulled me to standing using our still intertwined fingers. He pulled roughly at my belt, the buttons of my jeans. He pushed me onto the bed, my pants and underwear barely down my thighs. He slammed into my soaking wet pussy, his fingers finding my clit. I screamed for him, begging for more. I came once, twice and when he pulled himself free it was with a shudder of disappointment from me. But my Master was not done with me. He pushed his cock into my ass, ruthless and perfect. I lost track of the times I came, screaming for permission to do so. And still, my Master was not done with me. I had been holding my legs up and out of the way for him, but he pushed them to the side against the headboard. I was tight for him, swollen with numerous orgasms. When he pushed his fist deep I came undone. I rode wave after wave of squirting pleasure, writhing on the bed, begging him to never stop. I lost myself in the sensations and floated away into perfect bliss.

[Via http://bbwneedsitnow.wordpress.com]

'Hard' Premiere.

Youtube have deleted the Hard music video and only have a fast version of the song & video. But click here to view the actual video, it is on Rihannas official website Rihannanow.com and may take a few seconds to buffer & load. By far her sexiest video yet, enjoy the video is hot, sexy and well its Rihanna what more needs to be said.

[Via http://haygeee.wordpress.com]

Pink Map for iPhone

A new gay application for iPhone is revolutionizing the possibilities of meeting people within your community or when you travel. PinkMap is a system of encounters that works with an interactive map that shows you who’s logged in and where. In the U.S. it’s available also with information about bars, night clubs and saunas. If someone tries it out in Europe, please tell us about it. There’s also a chat application incorporated to it.

Developed by LocaMap

To use this gay-app, you should download it to your iPhone and register with a classic profile: Age, sex, similar to Facebook, where you can upload photos and events.

It’s especially handy when you’re out travelling.

[Via http://gaynest.wordpress.com]

Passion Erosion- Coping with less and less to talk about with the one you love

What do you do as a couple when the conversations dry up? Beecher and I do not have a lot in common. We deeply love one another other but find little we enjoy discussing together. We have created common hobbies (such as this blog) but outside of those conversations is a zero-sum game. Beecher’s likes are entirely different than my own. While each of us can hold tepid interests in each other’s topics, we are struggling to find common ground. We deeply desire to renew the once plentiful and intriguing conversations of our prior years when we first started dating.

In the first months of our relationship I couldn’t talk to Beecher enough. Hours were spent on the telephone exploring every inch of each other’s pasts (except her childhood sexual abuse which she only recently disclosed to me the details of), thoughts, and feelings. Fast forward to today where we have hit a brick wall. It feels as if there is no more to explore. I know what I think to be every square inch of Beecher’s past and the same goes for her. I know her thoughts and feelings on almost every issue at stake in our lives.

Because of this we are bored. Beecher knows my routine of popular talking pieces- politics, sex, what I want to do to improve our relationship, what gadget I want to buy next, and complaints about others, (especially drivers). I am likewise familiar with her repertoire- crafting, how much more she wants to attachment parent, what she found thrifting or made from her thrifted items, the next way we should “green” our lives, ways for us to save money, and things to start doing with Taylor. Each of these topics when discussed leaves one of us is barely listening to the other.

Beecher frequently chides me for not listening to her. When specific details of how she wants to parent Taylor don’t come to fruition she snaps (yes, she has a temper with me at times) that I didn’t listen to her clear desire to try it differently. In hindsight, these situations rather it be with parenting or something she wanted to try differently with saving money, stem from the fact I tuned her out as she rambled on about her same old topics.

Beecher contends my conversations bare no real significance. We all know you want to get laid more, and well, the politics of federal stimulus spending really don’t have any implications in our relationship. My head is in the clouds, intellectually pondering American society while Beecher is in the details of stay at home motherhood, and her crafts.

The realization has come that neither of us cares with the intensity the other cares about their particular pet project or issue. While I respect and encourage Beecher to raise our daughter as she sees fit- I would trade co-sleeping for having an entire bed to romp like the old days anytime. I am sure Beecher looks forward to the day when I retire petty pursuits of a “greater lifestyle” for organic living seated on modest means. Beecher still has that nursing mother libido problem and would prefer cuddling with Taylor while I want to work hard to have a successful career so that I can take advantage of such work with my family.

We may never see eye to eye on what we find important enough to discuss frequently with each other. We came close in the summer when we spent two months in Europe exploring places neither of us had ever seen before. However, since our return, the passionate conversations of our youth have again dissipated but the need for new environments to foster that healthy back and forth on things we both mutually care about is hugely important. With blogging we have made strides. We also read books together and enjoy cooking or taking walks, but I want there to be other areas too. Beecher has come to the conclusion that the olden days of me passionately walking into thrift stores with her reveling in the pursuit of vintage books are over. I have come to the conclusion that the days of passionately walking through the front door and having an impromptu romp are over. But these facts don’t mean that the days of passionately embarking on new frontiers is by far a long way from being over.

[Via http://pshouse.wordpress.com]

Craigslist

So. I post ads on Craigslist a lot. I love posting ads in the adult section. I love reading all of the emails from perverted men. I do meet one on occassion. I admit it. I don’t see anything wrong with it. People who go to bars pick up random people to fuck so I don’t see any difference. Some of them that reply are truly demented. Some of the men post some off the wall sexual shit and it turns me on to know that these dirty men want to use my body.

I love the thought of some stranger putting me on his knees and making me suck his cock. I love the thought of some stranger having 3 other men in his house and making me suck their cocks as well. Having all those men face fuck me and shove their cocks in my pussy until it hurt. Using my holes as their personal play toys.

I also love the thought of 2 of those men shoving 2 of their cocks in my pussy at the same time. I have a desire to be stretched. To walk away from getting fucked asking myself…”Damn did I really let them to do that to me?” I want to walk away feeling that I was a total slut for them. That my body make them feel good and I am nothing but their personal fuck toy.

I know I’m sick. But I like what I like. I have so many thoughts throughout the day about being just totally abused like a fucking sex slave. Just used over and over and over again. Slapped, spanked, choked. Just fucking destroyed.

Am I Sick?

[Via http://mydysfunctionalworld.wordpress.com]

Hit Me With Your Best Shot...

What body parts are cum-free zones?

Far: “You’ll shoot your eye out kid” ← this pretty much says it all. For the love of all that is unholy, not in my EYE! …. “It burns, it BURNS!”

Jen: None…give me the towel, please…

TechBabe:  ”There’s Something About Mary.” Yes, Mary’s got jizz in her hair. Unless your jizz has essential minerals, oils, and humectants, stay the fuck away from my hair! Anywhere else is free game. If you manage to shoot me in the eye, up the nose, or in the ear, then I’d think you were trying to kill me.

[Via http://threeway.wordpress.com]

Kittie & Charlie’s Kinky Advent Calender: Day 11

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Let down your hair...

There’s something so beautifully feminine about long hair.  Although most women can pull off a short hairstyle, long hair just seems more natural, more womanly.  “The kind of hair that a man could get lost in, and pleasantly so.  The kind of hair that, when I see a woman from a distance, and fantasies begin to take over my mind, I can almost feel that hair sweeping across my bare chest in the midst of the throes of passion.”

For work, I have to keep my hair tied back just as a matter of practicality, but at the end of the day, when I get to let my hair down, I love nothing more than tilting my head back and sweeping my hair side-to-side across my bare back.  Somehow I find great pleasure in this simple physical sensation.  Long, thick, soft hair sweeping across bare skin is oddly soothing, relaxing, pleasant, sensual.

[Via http://rhythmicfantasy.wordpress.com]

If rape were legal, I'd do it to you

So far, I think I’ve been fair-minded about Girl’s decision to attend school.  Just as she has been responding to school-related nonsense in good humor, I’ve been trying to do the same.  I have even blogged about some of it.

(in reverse chronological order)

I’m going to blow up your house
6th-grade science is pointless
Naps for middle schoolers?
Lessons learned in music class
She’s the shusher
Eighty percent of the class failed?
Your question needs refining
I’ve got one more
She’s resting her voice
Back 2 school

Recapping:  I don’t think that either of us enjoyed our last year of homeschooling together.  Girl had made up her mind that she was “missing out on the whole experience of going to school.”  She expressed her frustration by dragging her way through learning of any kind.  I tried every motivational tool in the book (with the exception of plumbing supplies to instill first-time obedience), but she was determined to prove to me, once and for all, that homeschooling was a bad idea.  Homeschooling isn’t a bad idea, it just stopped working for us – and it was wrecking our relationship. 

So, she started school in September – and she loves it.  She has made many very nice friends, her personality is flowering, her teachers seem to notice and like her, she is learning (though it’s all pretty dry and unchallenging material, for the most part) and getting good grades (4.0 GPA on her first trimester report card), but now there’s this:

I just learned that a (6th-grade) boy at her school was recently suspended for telling my daughter and her friend, “If rape were legal, I’d do it to you.”  Apparently, while the boy didn’t say this directly to my daughter, he addressed her friend, then added, “Tell (my daughter’s name) that this is for her, too.” 

What the hell. 

I’m guessing that my daughter’s name was never mentioned in the follow-up to this incident, as I’m only now hearing about it – and from my daughter only.  She insists that she doesn’t want me to contact the principal because “she wasn’t scared about it” and “it has all been dealt with already.”  “(The boy) has been suspended for a long time” and “he has to go to counseling now” and “his mom is furious at him.” 

WWYD?  (What would you do?)

[Via http://boremetotears.com]

Chubbers, a retrospective.

7 months postpartum I can say with great confidence that the craziest thing a person can do is grow a child inside of them. There is really nothing about that experience from start to finish that feels even the least bit logical. FIRST of all, how in the hell are you supposed to believe that mixing a little bit of this over here and a little bit of that over there creates an entirely new human being? Especially if you only have the word of an overpriced, asshole pregnancy test?

Secondly, the first time you feel the baby kick you is so surreal you’re pretty sure you dreamt the whole things and might have just been on acid for a few months (or hours, with acid you can never tell). As the baby gets bigger and tries to straight-up murder you by manipulating your internal organs to its own benefit you again say to yourself: WHY did I do this? This is insane! How is the human body “built for this.” If it were, it just seems like it wouldn’t be so entirely unpleasant.

Then of course labor. If you haven’t been through it, there is no way to describe the pain, horror, and intense loneliness of contractions. Unless you and a friend are going through them at the same time there’s pretty much no way you can garner enough sympathy from ANYONE, ANYWHERE to feel better. Also, you’re convinced that you’re dying. You are the small percentage of women who will literally go into shock and die from the pain of this monster trying to free itself of your flesh prison…(yes I just said went there.)

All things considered, it’s insane that anyone would go through the whole thing more than once, but people do. Today I found myself longing to get married and have multiple babies (one at a time) immediately. Yet there was something nagging at the back of my mind, a brief memory of how I felt waddling around like a cow vowing to never ever have sex again. So I went into my pictures folder.

A week before my due date, I was so fucking pissed off and upset I decided to take full nude pictures of myself pregnant to document the horror that befalls a woman when she’s sperminated, as a reminder to myself to stay celibate…and not abuse cake privileges. Don’t get me wrong here, my son is the best thing I’ve ever done in my entire life, and if someone told me now I’d have to repeat that year like it was groundhog’s day for the next 100 years I’d do it…but since I’m not in a stupid 90’s movie I wanted something to veer me away from that particular fate.

So I opened the hidden folder of my bad-self and almost threw up. Not gonna lie here, I gained an extraordinary amount of weight when I was pregnant. Having dealt with food issues since I was about 16, the thrill of eating my fucking face off 24 hours a day for nine months really appealed to me and I took full advantage of guilt-free carb ransackery. I think I gained like 65 lbs and checked into the hospital at a cranky, leaky 182. Which is what the pictures accurately documented. A GODDAMN BALLOON OF CRANKY, LEAKY FLESH PRISON.

I can hardly remember any of that now, a mere 6-7 months later. Except for a couple of small marks near where I got my bellybutton pierced I look exactly the same. No stretch marks, no saggy skin, no hip displacement, no inside out cooter like all the message boards told me would happen. It’s like I’m brand new, except more awesome because my kid is fucking adorable.

I don’t really know where this is going, but if I get pregnant again I’ll need a full time sponsor to call whenever I think Betty Crocker wants to just “hang out and talk.” Don’t you lie to me again, skank. You KNOW I can’t just have one!

[Via http://sdoodle.wordpress.com]

Gays Faulted for Tiger Woods Infidelity

Will Tiger’s wife blame his 2X cheating heart on the gays – too? Well… Jenny Sanford did!

Jenny Sanford is the wife of former South Carolina Gov. Mark Stanford. Remember Gov. Stanford: the scandal and love affair between Argentinean mistress Belen Chapur and the S.C. governor who appeared to have gone missing. Under enormous pressure, the gov. returned to the United States from Argentina, after his office initially said he was hiking in Appalachia.

Well… Mrs Sanford certainly blames her infidel husband’s actions on gay folk.

“Of course I’m not saying that Mark is gay, but he may as well be. The moral decay in this country has claimed another victim and this time it was my family. Our marriage was perfect until these laws started passing around the country. Clearly the slow dissolution of the sanctity of marriage in America seeped into Mark’s psyche until he no longer felt compelled to abide by our vows.”

Therefore, now heterosexual men have a damn good excuse for cheating: Blame it on the gays!

Here’s the scenario:
She: Have you been fucking around on me? ( holding a knife in left hand)
Him: Sorry honey but the gays made me fuck those woman. (lying in bed wearing Xmas print boxers)
She: What? (slowly lowers knife; places knife on top of dresser)
He: Yeah, Bo, civil rights for gays got me all twisted. ( exiting bed – quickly gets dressed)
She: Really? (arms reaching out to him)
He: For real! Baby, I gotta go out here and protect our sanctity of marriage.
She: Oh, my Bo is so social conscious. To think, you did it for us.
He: Yeah, I did it because I’m proud to be an American with strong family values and morales.
She. Gosh, (tears begin to fall from her eyes).
She: Babe, please forgive me; I know it hard being a strong man with morals out here. I’m so proud of you! ( couple kiss and return to bed)
The End.

Thanks Clips N Chips for the post idea.

[Via http://marlonb.wordpress.com]

Dear Dr V

Wow, I haven’t done this much work since those twins in Oklahoma City back in ‘98. I’ve recently received this letter and because of the young nature of this young man, I’ve decided it needed my immediate attention.

Dear Doctor V,

When I see the upturned white tail of a doe, surrounded by that light brown speckled fur, I think, man, I want some of that. The white part is so pure-seeming, the speckles like a visual poetry designed to overthrow all reason into a swarm of unabashed deer-fucking. Is this normal?

Billy
Age 8

Billy, Billy, Billy, Billy. For a young boy who’s vocabulary is so advanced, I’m disappointed to see you haven’t matured enough to know how to solve this issue yourself. If your father has answered your problem before I’ve been able to respond, I apologize for the archaic nature of our mail delivery system. The answer to this problem has been passed down from fathers around the world. Their advice would say that your problem is normal and it’s only a part of growing up. While so called “deer-fucking” is normal, the process of doing the deed is where senior advice and oversight is often needed. When approaching the deer from behind, you have to be aware of the danger of them kicking and seriously injuring you. Every man has their own technique for accomplishing this task but in the end you’ll develop your own style for this. The first thing you need to do is buy yourself a tranquilizer gun, though you may need your fathers help for this as most retailers are reluctant to sell one to anyone under 16 years old. Next time you see your white-tailed friend, shoot it with the tranquilizer to subdue the animal. This will allow you to approach the deer from any angle, thus allowing you to fulfill any one of your multiple fantasies. The spooning position is a favourite of mine.

Get out there and put the Bam in Bambi.

[Via http://radradar.wordpress.com]

Merry SeX-mas

Today is December 4.

Far from stating the obvious, today is a day of panic. (Okay, I guess the reason why is a little less obvious…)

Christmas is around the corner and I have no ideas for what to get that special person in my life who has everything you could possibly imagine: the Xbox, the car, and his own place (come to think about it: the perfect ingredients to manhood freedom). I am a girl in her first relationship so the idea of gifting to a significant other is a new concept for me. Ideas, thoughts, and fantasies keep swimming through my head. I have a couple gift ideas, but I cannot help but feel as if the media around me is pushing, rather, shoving me in a particular direction. Having watched the Victoria Secret Fashion show a couple days ago, various commercials, and flipped through magazines, the message seems blindingly clear: the perfect ideas for Christmas presents seems to be those that involve sex.

Alright, alright. We all know that sex sells. That’s why I, as a conscientious consumer, have been inundated with images of threesomes, provocative positions, and scantily-clad boys and girls attempting to make lingerie, intimate oils, and condoms seem like the perfect gift ideas. However, I am very skeptical about their merits as gifts.

Gift Idea #1?

Gift Idea #2?

***

I refuse to be influenced.

However, this still leaves me without any idea what to get my significant other for Christmas this year. Does anyone have any ideas for me? Let me know!

Cheers,

The Voice of the Vixen

[Via http://theverbosevixen.wordpress.com]

Cosmopolitan Crap

I used to read Cosmo mags all the time when I was younger because I stole them from my work. I was a 16 year old virgin who hadn’t ever seen a dick, yet I couldn’t resist the promise of juicy sex tips. What were the 194 new ways to please my man? What was the secret sex move that drives 72% of men wild? What could I tell about his personality from his bulge? There was so much I needed to learn! Of course, the magazine’s intrigue wore off after just a few issues. I recall reading one particular article suggesting women show cleavage to land that promotion they’re after. I couldn’t believe it. If I remember correctly, a photo of a model wearing glasses floating near the tip of her nose, a leopard print bra peeping out of a mostly-unbuttoned shirt, a form-fitting pencil skirt and unbelievably high heels ran alongside the article. Coincidentally, that is what I wear to the office every day (except on casual Friday – that’s when I break out the ol’ PVC corset). All jokes aside, I was fuming. I convinced myself I’d start a petition – or at the very least, write a letter – in hopes of shutting this bullshit magazine down.

Well, I got lazy, but on the bright side, the article served as a wake up call. After that, I was able to see the magazine for what it truly is: formulaic crap designed to generate mass profit off women’s fears and insecurities. OK, so that wasn’t exactly the revelation of the century, but trust me – millions of women read this thing every month, from cover to cover, and use it as an instruction manual.

Let’s have a look at the January 2010 issue, shall we?

Wait – What the fuck happened to Amanda Bynes? I barely recognize her. Come back, Amanda circa Holly from What I like About You. I liked that show.

OK, down to business. That teaser at the top – to your left – is there all the goddamn time. At least I think it is. Every month, that spot is occupied by a different sex-related teaser that’s always (or usually) in a larger font than the others. This is of course meant to grab your attention because women are taught to be insecure when it comes to sex. I assure you that more likely than not, your man thinks you’re wonderful in bed and is more than happy to be getting laid. Do you honestly fear he might be bored and want to try something different? Stick a finger in his ass. There, now give me $7. By the way, you should realize that these little headlines are always about pleasing HIM – never you. Cosmo doesn’t care about your orgasm.

The other teasers are just as bullshitty so I wasn’t even gonna bother going through them, but then “YOUR HOO-HA HANDBOOK: GET A HEALTHY, SEXY VAGINA” slapped me in the face. Is a magazine aimed at adult women really using the term “hoo-ha”? I’m all for alliteration but this is ridiculous. By the way, your vagina is fine as it is and definitely does need any added sexiness. And when it comes to its health – well, the vag cleans itself. Visit a gyno once a year (and when you think something might be wrong) and bam! You’re keeping it healthy.

As you can see, there is really no need to buy this issue (or any issue, ever again), as I’ve just basically spoiled it.

-Melissa

[Via http://badbangs.wordpress.com]

10 Totally Useless Information Regarding Me

This is going to be my 10th posts and I’ve decided to write down some stuff regarding me (in no particular order).

10 things about me

1. I’ve never broken one of my bones or had stitches (knock on wood).
2. I like going dancing even if I don’t think I’m very good at it. The same applies for singing.
3. I am a total tea junkie. I can have many a day. I just love the smell of it as well.
4. I have never tried (and probably never will) serious drugs. I also don’t smoke.
5. I always consider myself as a pacifist.
6. I love routine and tidiness in certain aspects of my life. For example I like taking the same route to clinic every day. I like placing objects in my pockets the same way each time. I like making lists of things I have to do. My world will not collapse if things turn out differently, but still.. My room is always tidy, even with dust all around.
7. My favourite cuisines are Indonesian (for obvious reasons), Oriental (Chinese, Japanese, Thai, Vietnamese) and Italian.
8. I admire loyalty in a person and I find grounded confidence very appealing. If you add to that a good sense of humour, a cute face and a caring heart I can go nuts!
9. My first video game I played was Atari. YES! Atari!
10. I can speak two languages apart from my native mother tongue. English and Japanese. I also understand people who speak Dutch, German, French and Swedish, but all of them have gone a bit rusty though.

10 things in my room

1. Bed
2. Telly
3. Books
4. Snacks (Yes, I like snacking in the middle of the night)
5. MacBook
6. Printer
7. CDs and DVDs
8. Chairs
9. Bedside table lamp
10. Mirror

10 things that scare me

1. Losing my loved ones
2. Needles (Don’t judge me I’m only human!)
3. Cockroach
4. Cancer
5. Surgeons
6. Earthquakes
7. Fire
8. Got electrocuted
9. Plane crash
10. Morgue

10 things I like

1. Sex (I’ll just state that once generally)
2. Travelling
3. Watching people in Departure/Arrivals
4. Enjoying dinner with friends
5. Classical music
6. Books
7. Films
8. Classical concerts
9. Running
10. Photography

10 things I hate

1. Can’t afford some things I want
2. Confrontation
3. Asking for money (that unfortunately includes asking for a pay rise)
4. Being dependant on people I don’t actually like (my boss)
5. Cleaning up someone else’s mess (some friends excluded)
6. People blowing smoke to my face
7. Being late in an appointment
8. Waiting for someone who is late in an appointment
9. Being judged differently
10. Talks behind my back

10 things to do before I die

1. Get married
2. Get a cat
3. Learn a 7th foreign language
4. Travel around the world
5. Travel to the Caribbean Islands
6. Get a six-packed abs
7. Join a triathlon
8. Do some more volunteer work
9. Move in to my own house
10. More party, party and party!

10 things I can do

1. Slide my tongue
2. Multitask (mostly)
3. Be disciplined
4. Play badminton
5. Cook (I haven’t food poisoned anyone and I get some good feedback)
6. Solve computer related problems (or at least know where to look)
7. Win every time I play Scrabble
8. Speak easily in front of a crowd
9. Enjoy watching football
10. Play piano and violin

10 things I cannot do

1. Blink one of my eyes
2. Move my ears
3. Improve my accent in French
4. Be bored of sex
5. Whistle
6. Make bubble gums (I really don’t know why)
7. Butterfly stroke swimming
8. Back crawl swimming
9. Bungee jumping (heart problems)
10. Complicated roller coasters (also related to heart problems)

10 favourite films

1. Serendipity
2. Lake House
3. Pride and Prejudice
4. The Family Stone
5. Harry Potters
6. Love Actually
7. Just Like Heaven
8. Brokeback Mountain
9. The Holiday
10. The Terminal

10 things I say often

1. Boookkk!! (just an exclamation)
2. Asal lu tau aja ya… (English equivalent: For your information…)
3. Yep
4. Oi
5. Holla
6. Pastinya (English equivalent: Sure)
7. Alamak!! (just an exclamation)
8. Eh lu tau ngga sih? (English equivalent: You know what?)
9. Dank je (Dutch) or Danke (German)
10. Anyway…

[Via http://toothsculptor.wordpress.com]

Impaired Satiety

There goes Victoria with her dictionnary games again… what the hell does “impaired satiety” mean?

 Well, impaired means that something has been compromised; that it’s not working as it should.

 And satiety means: n.  The condition of being full or gratified beyond the point of satisfaction. So what is impaired satiety? It is when the body no longer knows when it has had enough. I came across the expression while studying books about eating disorders… in particular, bulimia nervosa… when people overeat regularly, they lose contact with the feeling of being satisfied or having had enough.

I know that feeling. I have been a compulsive eater off and on my whole life… my eating habits change according to the level of drama in my mind, and the drama increases exponentially according to how badly I eat! It’s a vicous cycle, whereas eating more gently and reasonably also have the subsequent effect of making me more gentle and reasonable… which would be what, an “unvicious cycle”? How about a “beneficent cycle” (found that on the Internet… not bad).

So. Beyond the eating disorder application, I immediately thought of pornography. Sometimes, I spend long lonely hours on the Internet, writing, blogging, answering emails, sending out new emails, researching this that and the other thing and just plain old reading news, blogs and other people’s stories. I don’t have a TV so it’s not only a place where I work, I also go there for entertainment, diversion and connection with far-away friends. I do not surf porn sites, I’d rather draw sex any day, but I must admit I often think of the people, particularly men, who do regularly watch porn, because although I’m not here to judge that, I find it extremely sad. Because real sex is so much better. Real people, real touch, real emotions. Pornography is just like fast food; cheap, exciting, sweet, salty, greasy and easy. Immediately satisifying, but it just brings you down in the long run.

Someone asked me who my audience is for my web site and my blog, and I answered that I can only guess that it’s very mixed. I have received alot of very positive (and highly appreciated!) feedback over the years from a wide variety of people, men and women, young and old, straight and gay. I guess I’m trying to reach out to the prudish, like I was; people whose sexuality is inhibited, and perhaps feels lacking or stunted, to let them know that there is much yet to explore and it’s all okay! But I must admit that I also think of the guy who’s jerking off in front of the computer while his wife or girlfriend sleeps, or whose loneliness can no longer be appeased by a real person. That’s why it’s okay with me if this site finds itself  mixed in with pornography sites… it’s like putting a crisp fresh leaf of lettuce in with the hamburger, or lighting a candle to offer a glimmer of hope in a very dark place.

If you never stop eating junk food, you can’t really taste the healthy food or feel it’s calming effect on your body. If you never stop feeding your mind with cheap, meaningless sexual images, how will you actually feel the tenderness of a truly loving caress when it comes your way? Or how will you find the state of mind in which to offer such a caress, if all you have seen goes straight to the slamming? Loving sex, like healthy food, is a nourishing, fulfilling and extremely satisfying aspect of being fragile and human. Like good health, loving relationships are built one thought, one look, one word, one kiss at a time… and life is so short… shouldn’t we savour every single bite?

[Via http://victoriassexblog.wordpress.com]